Empty Nest: caretakers

Friday, August 4, 2017

Try, Try Again

Try, try, and try as I might I shall never be a caregiver. And I don't really try all that hard because I'm not cut out for it. `A natural caregiver doesn't have to try, they just do. It comes naturally to them. I don't like it, I'm not good at it, and I find it awkward and intrusive. I hope I never have to depend on a caregiver.

Caregivers are some of the most special people on the planet and no one will ever be able to convince me otherwise. They are unselfish and kind-hearted. Their patience level is off the charts. And I am not one of them.

Some of you know Mother has come to stay here for a while after a week long hospital stay. Nothing will prove you inept at caregiving quicker than having an older parent move in. I vote for in home care and I will vote for it every single time. Because I am not a caregiver. Oh, I'm doing it but I'm not digging it.

I love finding new heart/diabetic friendly recipes and preparing meals. I don't mind serving the meals and cleaning up after. But that's pretty much where it ends.

I'm not medically inclined one bit and I am not a fan of discussing medical issues. I'm not a fan of strangers in my house. Patience has never been my friend. The fibromyalgia imposes limits on what I can do and/or duration of the activity. I have hyper sensitive senses which keep me all sorts of inside and quiet and I am allergic to nearly everything under the sun that involves chemicals or flowers. Anxiety? Yep, that too.

Excuses? No just limitations that I have to try and exceed right now and that's not been a good thing. And Mother has always been proud of her independence so it's not easy for her. AND I will be having a come to Jesus with that hospital but that's for another time.

Through it all, we still keep trying to laugh because that's what our family does. We laugh our way through as many situations as we can. And of course, there's the whole Mother is still with us so we're very grateful. And her doctors are nothing less than completely amazed at her progress so it seems she will regain that independence she values so much.

So maybe I'm sort of a caregiver just not a good one. If you ask Mother she'll say I am but that's what older Southern Mothers do- tell things about their kids the way they see them not the way we really are.

I think Yoda might be right. I'm better when I just do it. If I try, I see my shortcomings. When I just do, I do what has to be done to the best of my ability. When I try, I compare myself to others. When I do, I'm too busy for comparisons.

And then again, I'm probably overthinking the whole thing. As usual. I should try to stop that.

This post was inspired by 5 Minute Friday.

Have a great weekend, Y'all!

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Welcome!

Being a transplant to the low-country of SC for 31 years is still not long enough to be called a ‘benyeh.’ If I stay until I’m dead I’ll probably go a ‘comeyeh’ since I am, originally, ‘from off’ (which is the upstate but, rules you know). By day I take care of my sweet little granddaughter, Baby M and do all those things I did when I was a SAHM raising four daughters which has translated to, ‘by day, I am exhausted.’ By night I blog, blog, blog, and blog some more or I sleep, depending on my level of exhaustion (do they still make Geritol?). I have a very unhealthy addiction to sweets (nearly any kind will do) and all comfort foods not covered under the ‘sweets’ category. I’m known for speaking my mind so, if you don’t want to know, don’t ask me. I love to find the humor in my empty nest life. I live life hard and smack into that brick wall almost daily because I’ve always had to learn the hard way. Why change now? I’m so glad you’ve come to laugh with me as I do this middle age, empty nest thing like a BOSS!