My Little Mountain Getaway, Part 3: Travelling with Adult Kids

Suppose you hadn't had a 'real' vacation in your married life- well, maybe two. Exactly, two. And then suppose that you decided that, since the kids were all grown up and moved out (except the two who moved back in) you would take yourself a nice, quiet, alone vacation.

I live at the coast but I LOVELOVELOVE the mountains. We spent quite a lot of time up there when I was growing up. My family went camping a good bit. So my little vacation was going to be up in the blue ridge mountains. All by myself. And Tucker, of course.

Most of you already know that my plan was quickly sabotaged by all four of the lovelies, SILextraordinaire, DrummerBoy, and my dad and step-mom. Yep. Quite quickly.

This was really not that big of a deal. I love my kids and time spent with adult children becomes tricky when they all live in different towns and/or states. Just getting together often requires a big family event like a wedding or a major holiday such as Christmas.

And there was the fact that I had no transportation. Slight issue. Ha!

The day after Christmas, Deanie, Breezy, Tucker, and I set out for the mountains. Birdie, SILextraordinaire, DoodleBug and DrummerBoy would all meet us the following day and my dad and step-mom would also arrive on Sunday.

The trip up was interesting. Everyone in our family is rather tall- 5'8"- 5'10" for the women and up to 6'4" for the boys- so riding up in DoodleBug's car was not the easiest thing for the three tallest females to do. Especially since it was packed FULL. DoodleBug drives this:

It's a 2011 Suzuki Sportback SX4. Or, as I like to call it (because it's a much more accurate description), a clown car. 

DoodleBug is the shortest of all the family, standing 5'5". The car is perfect for her. It's not so perfect for the rest of us. Not on a 3 1/2 hour trip to the mountains. Deanie, our driver, stands 5'8" and forgot to put the seat back before she packed the space behind the seat, tight. I rode shotgun and Breezy was directly behind me. We are both, 5'10". Two of us do not travel well under ideal conditions. So, you can imagine how this trip went. I will say though, that the complaints were accompanied by 3 1/2 hours of laughing so, not as bad as it could have been.

When we arrived, one of the first things I noticed after the magnificent view and the coziness of the cabin was that my grown up kids still act like they are little when we are all together. I'm the one cooking and cleaning up and blahblahblah. I paid for the cabin and they're having all the fun. Something is seriously wrong with this picture.

So, I've come up with a little list that will help me the next time we go up to the cabin.

10 Suggestions as to How to Vacation with Grown Up Kids.

1. Do not go in a clown car. Unless you are short. Or a clown. Do have a couple of cars so that people can do their own thing.
2. Remind your kids, who ARE all grown ups, that you are no longer in the business of raising them. They are responsible for helping with EVERYTHING.
3. Make it clear that you are only responsible for your dog, not theirs. 
4. Make it clear that outside visitors are not to be invited without your ok. That may be just fine with y'all, but I was on vacation. I was not interested in entertaining. 
5. Make sure they understand that they are responsible for cleaning up after themselves. There is no reason in the world why people cannot clean up after themselves. Especially when we're talking about grown ups. And none of this, "I'll do it later," BS. That translates to, "If I leave it long enough, Mom will clean it up." Newsflash: No, she won't.
6. Make everyone responsible for a meal. Deanie took on the breakfasts while we were on vacation. Unfortunately, she had to leave on the 30th which meant that I could either take over cooking breakfast or just not have any. I'm just not that easy about making it only for myself. Maybe I should try harder... Anyway, suggest that the meals be easy and able to feed a crowd. Like spaghetti or chili. If we want a fancy meal, we can eat out. OH-take coffee and a HUGE French press. There will be no possible way to survive a vacation with your grown up kids without coffee. For them and for you.
7. Take loads of games. Maybe it's just my family, but playing games is something we love doing so, taking a bunch of our favorite games along keeps everyone happy and laughing.
8. Paying your own way. Everyone is a grown up in my family now. They all have grown up and jobs and, a couple of them make more money than I. SO, when going shopping or participating in an activity that costs money or eating out, everyone should pay their own way. It gets rather costly when you have to pay for your grown up kids plus their significant others. Though I'm not really opposed to treating everyone to ONE meal out. My granddaddy and dad always did/do that so, apple and tree...
9. Pick a place to stay that offers togetherness and privacy. Spending time together becomes all the more important when the kids are all grown up and living in their own homes in their own towns/cities/states. But, it's also important, when everyone is back under one roof, to make sure people have somewhere to have quiet time. It you're the parent, you're most likely used to quiet and will soon realize that you miss it. Choose wisely.
10. Remind everyone (mostly yourself) that not all of you HAVE to go to the same places every single day. Personal preferences are allowed. It's works well to do some things all together and some things in small groups or as couples or alone. Mainly, don't depend on too much planning. Be will to go with the flow. 

I hope y'all can see the humor here. The humor that keeps me from killing someone. Ha! The truth is, it is different traveling with your adult children. Even when two of them have returned to the nest. Maybe y'all don't have the same situation as I. Maybe your kids don't go straight into assuming that things will be the same as when they were growing up. Regardless, I thoroughly enjoyed vacationing with them! They still make life fun and funny. And I hope that never changes!

What are your ideas on traveling with adult children?

Monday Memories: A Vacation Memory

Hey, y'all! Monday which brings us one of my favorite memes and it's all about sharing memories! Y'all know how much I appreciate memories so you can imagine how excited I was to hear of a meme all about writing our memories! 

Want to join in? Just click the button and link up to Memory Monday at Retired, Not Tired!

This week's prompt is: A Vacation Memory

I've posted this vacation memory before but I just realized that it took place quite close to the very spot of our latest vacation! I'm glad I didn't realize this before we went. Ha!

When I was growing up our family took the usual annual vacation to either the beach or the mountains but we also got to go camping sometimes just for the weekend. These camping trips were so much fun! We would go to the mountains and just have a nice relaxing weekend of camping. One weekend we went to a campground in a town where friends of our parents lived. It was only an hour or two away and a couple of other families came along as well. My parents friends had one son and a daughter much younger than any of us and the rest of the crew all had sons. Basically, it was going to be a weekend of boys what with my three brothers as well. But this wasn't a terrible thing as I was a tomboy. When we got to the campground it was practically deserted --as it was the off season—with only 3 campers in the whole place. Not a problem since there were plenty of us to have fun and go exploring. Once we were set up, it was time to explore so we headed out for a walk.

Once we hit just the right spot in the dirt road, we saw an old house looming ahead on the left.  There has never been a better haunted looking house in a Hollywood movie. This place was two stories high with a widow’s walk on top. The siding was old and gray looking with some slats hanging down at an angle from the rusty old nails that could no longer hold them in place. There were steps leading up to a porch that spanned the front of the house. Several of the boards curved up at the edge of the steps and the porch and there were holes where the wood had given up and rotted away. There was a porch swing hanging at one end of the porch and it creaked, just a little, in the breeze. Most of the windows had been broken, leaving half panes of jagged glass and, those that were intact, were covered in a film of dust and age. Through the windows, we could see old, tattered curtains hanging limp. The walkway leading up to the wide steps was no longer level and was cracked in places with weeds growing up through them. The front yard was overgrown with weeds and dead bushes and was surrounded by an old, gray picket fence that swayed in places and had more leaning slats than straight up and down ones. To enter the walkway leading to the house, we had to pick the gate, that was hanging by only one rusted hinge, up and place it to one side. Several old trees that had already shed most of their leaves were on either side of the house reaching out with their spindly arms. It was coming on dusk; there was a slight breeze; and not a sound was heard other than the ever so slight creaking of the porch swing and the occasional rustling of dead leaves.

My fearless brother

There were seven of us kids altogether and we decided that perhaps going up to the door and going inside that house was not the best idea we’d ever had. We discussed this in quiet whispers all the while keeping our eyes sharply focused on the house. Finally, my brave brother, Tony, said- in his best 11-year-old manly voice, “I’m not scared. I’ll go in.” The rest of us stood statue still in a bit of shock at hearing his words and Tony had an expression on his face that clearly indicated he, too, was wondering who the hell said that. Mere seconds passed as my courageous brother realized that it was indeed his voice and that now, because of his big fat mouth impulsive bravery, he was going to have to go into the haunted house. His steps were shaky and slow as he proceeded up the worn path to the first step. He slowly and carefully placed one foot up on the step and looked back. We were all still standing there with wide eyes and opened mouths. Tony walked up each step with uncertainty and paused to look back again when he stood, nervously, on the porch. We had not moved a muscle.  Tony took small, careful, baby steps all the way to the front door and stopped. He gingerly reached out his hand to open the old door. At that very moment that insignificant breeze that had caused only slight movement of the porch swing and a gentle (albeit creepy) rustling of the leaves became a wind. And that wind was strong enough to blow the curtain hanging at the broken windows. that ran vertically beside the front door, out just far enough to brush my brother’s arm.  

To this day I do not think that my fearless brother’s feet touched any part of that house or the earth as he spun around and took off! He was beside us and then past us within a millisecond and there was dust behind him as he flew down the dirt road. The expression on his face illustrated scared shitless terrified quite well with the eyes bugging out and the extreme paleness of his color. As soon as we realized what had happened (and it took a few seconds), we laughed hysterically- half from my brother’s reaction to the curtain and half from sheer relief. Of course we had to go off after him because he was running in the opposite direction of our campsites. Along the way we met our parents’ friends who were driving out to visit- complete with Tony on the hood of their car.     

My fearless brother and his lovely wife, Christmas 2014.