The kitchen is the heart of my home just like it was at Grandmother's. But things do look different and the food that comes out of mine couldn't touch hers with a hundred foot pole. My dining table isn't covered in a white tablecloth with a centerpiece perfectly placed and reflecting the current season because there are way too many craft materials sitting on mine. The main room in my house is different, too as it houses a cradle filled with toys, bookshelves filled with kids' books, random balls under the furniture, and a naked Barbie sitting on a side table.
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| Naked Barbie. And yes that is Bug's hair tie because where else would a hair tie be? Certainly not in her hair. At least there aren't any crumbs. This time. |
Grandmother's house held no toys but there was so much to do and explore. I loved getting into her closet and going through her pocketbooks. Grandmother had pocketbooks for every outfit and she left dainty handkerchiefs, hard candy, and change in some of them and finding those trinkets was the equivalent of finding a buried pirate treasure for me. If I was there on her big cleaning day (which was Tuesday because Granddaddy owned the dry cleaners/laundry in town and he picked up all the linens on Tuesdays so Grandmother cleaned everything on those days) Grandmother somehow made polishing the furniture a game for me. To this day I cannot dust without following the grain of the wood. Her hardwood floors were my ice skating rink. She had one of those secretaries (the furniture, ha) and the little door in the middle above the desk looked like the door to their church so I played church with that thing over and over and the drawers held treasures of pictures of generations of family and I gazed on those time after time for hours, I have some of those photos in my possession now. And our time in the kitchen was never dull.
My granddaddy was the best. He came home from 'the cleaners' every noon for lunch and, if I was there, I would hide in a big closet and wait for him to find me. He would wander through the house calling my name and I would giggle so hard because he had such a time finding me even though I hid in the same closet every. single. time. Granddaddy never seemed to tire of that game but I'm pretty sure he did after raising my own kids and now having grandchildren. He never let me know it, though. Not one time did he fail to look for me and act surprised and excited when he found me.
My grandparents' energy was never-ending while mine can barely get me up three steps and Grandmother sang all the time while working. All. The. Time. I'm way too busy wishing someone else would wash the dang dishes, vacuum the floors, clean this and that to hum a tune.
But we loved spending time together and this is what I hope I do have in common with my grandparents.
I have heard talk that Bug will go to the door at her house and, when asked where she's going she replies, "Amma's house." And when she is here she will suddenly stop playing, turn and look at me, flash me the biggest smile and throw herself around my neck with a huge bear hug completely melting my heart. I'm taking these as good signs that I'm doing ok in the grandparenting department.
I still believe it's all about time. As grandparents, we surely value time differently or I know I do now compared to when I was raising four daughters. Not that I didn't spend time with my girls, I did. I gave up entering the workforce to stay home and I devoted nearly every minute to them and their wellbeing. However, it's so much easier now to drop everything and focus solely on a grandkiddo. I don't have to rush out to work in the mornings or have them ready to go and out the door. I don't have to be responsible for three meals/day. I can have them help me bake cookies and we can eat as many as we want. As long as they don't get hurt, I couldn't care less if something gets broken. Grandparenting is easy. Fun. Relaxing.
We make messes, play until we're tired and then keep playing, celebrate birthdays, watch movies, hug a lot, laugh until we ache, eat whatever we want...
So, my house isn't like my grandmother's house but I think that's ok. I learned the importance of laughter, time, unconditional love from my grandparents and that's exactly what I give my grandloves. And that's what I think makes all the difference.
Does your house look like your grandmother's house?
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