You Don't Need a Book for That

The daughter of a dear friend is having her very first baby soon and she put a question out on facebook asking whether or not anyone had read a certain parenting book and whether or not they recommended she read it herself.

Many of her friends encouraged her to buy not only one book but several. And pick the one that's right for her lifestyle.

Really?

I don't think so.

First of all, no book is going to be able to tell you how to raise your individual child. They are all different and, just as soon as you think you have him/her/them figured out---they change.

Secondly, those books out there are telling the reader how the author thinks children should be raised. Do parents these days really want someone else making that decision for them?

Third, most of the books are very general but they don't bother explaining that to the readers. Which means that, when their baby doesn't crawl at a certain age, the parents are going to freak out. And, in most cases, unnecessarily so.

So, to the new parents/parents to be out there, I say this:

• Be a student of your child. No one will ever know your child better than you. Use this knowledge and let that dictate how you will raise your child.
• Do NOT compare your child to other children and do not compare each of your children to each other.
• Relax and let your instincts help guide you. Trust yourself.
• When in doubt, ask an experienced parent.Your own parents are excellent resources! 
• There is no set cut off date for each phase a child goes through. They advance through stages and phases at different times even within the same family.
• IF you decide to read one of THOSE books, use it only as a general reference and not a solid truth. 
• As they grow up, learn to pick your battles. Sometimes the consequences of the acts will enough. Don't add insult to injury.
• Laugh. A lot!

Finally, enjoy every single moment that you spend raising those marvelous little miracles. And that includes the trying times. Because, in the mere blink of an eye, they'll be all grown up and out on their own. 

What would y'all say to first time/new/expectant parents? I'd love to put the comments together for them. You know, in a sort of 'book' form. LOL Only this advice would be worthy of reading! Hugs, y'all!