Devotions from the Kitchen Table

I loved spending time with my grandmother as most of you know as I've written about my grandparents many times. Not a day goes by that I don't miss them and enjoy a memory or two about our time together. The kitchen was the heart of my grandmother's home and times spent in there with her have always been some of my favorite memories. I've tried to make our kitchen the heart of our home as well and I think I was successful as we still gather around the table to visit, share stories, play games, and enjoy food together. Our family is comfortable around the kitchen table. It's a place where we feel safe and relaxed. It's a place of love and zero judgment. We bring our true selves to the kitchen table because we know we are loved and accepted no matter what.


When I was given the opportunity to review, DEVOTIONS FROM THE KITCHEN TABLE, I knew it would be a good choice for me. I wasn't disappointed.

I am usually disappointed in devotionals.

When it comes to devotionals, I am usually disappointed. It seems they lean towards telling readers what to do and how to do it or sharing some story that seems more judgmental than helpful or they don't seem to relate to everyday life and then there are the ones that are just downright boring or written by people who don't seem to know their subject matter.

Devotions from the Kitchen Table is fabulous!

Yes, I'm picky when it comes to any book offering daily readings. DEVOTIONS FROM THE KITCHEN TABLE offers 90 daily readings that I found thought-provoking, funny, interesting, inspiring, and encouraging. Some entries took me right back to my grandmother's kitchen table. Even the photographs are appealing. There was something warm and cozy on every page.

I went ahead and read through the whole book (90 devotions) and will now enjoy reading through each entry one day at a time. This is a devotional that won't end up in a yard sale. As a matter of fact, I think this one make a great gift for someone's birthday, Mother's Day, even a nice shower gift.

What I'd like to see...

The only thing missing from this book are the recipes to go with those amazing pictures! And maybe a bit of space on the sides for notes. I didn't want to write on the photos. They're just too lovely.

Thanks to BookLook Bloggers for my copy of this lovely book. This review contains only my own honest opinions.  

Pinnacle Lust

Hello, Bloggy Friends!

I feel as though it's been YEARS since I last connected even though it's been less than three weeks. All I can say is, the end of the school year is a busy, time consuming, energy zapping SOB. It's like this every year and then, when it's over, I sit and wonder what the hell to do with all this time on my hands. Good grief.

Luckily, I'm a reader. If I don't care for housework, and I certainly do not, I can read. If I want to stay away from the television, and I do, I can read. If I want to go to the beach with a book, I can. If I want to sit on the deck or the front porch in my rocker with a book, I can. If I want people to leave me alone, and this is something I always desire, I can take that book and read or pretend to be reading and they will go away.

Books are wonderful creations.

So, what better way to get this little blog spot back in the game by offering y'all a giveaway of my first read of summer break?!

The book is PINNACLE LUST and it was written by Michell Dim-St. Pierre. I'm not going to go all into what my opinion of the book was. I'll save that for another time. I'm merely going to say that, if you've been at school all year and have time on your hands, this wouldn't be a bad choice for your first summer read on the beach, or your deck, or your front porch. If your job lasts year 'round, taking this one on vacation for an easy, quick first read wouldn't be horrible. If you are retired or work at home, this book wouldn't suck as a little reprieve from whatever routine you have going.

I do think it's only fair to warn you, however, that this book is the first in a series and the end makes you quite aware of that fact. I won't voice my opinion of that either. Not yet.

The main character, Sharon Lipadot, who "was born a kosher and a graceful Jewish girl in Israel" (page 4) was not interested in religion but "belonged...to the secular"(page 4) Jews, is a nurse in a hospital in Israel. Her trouble, my word, begins on page 5 when she meets the magnetizing Dr. Sloan. The rest of the book tells their story.

Are there any steamy scenes? Sort of.
Does the trouble have anything to do with infidelity? Maybe.
Is there a lunatic in the story? Perhaps.
Am I going to tell you anything else about the story itself? Nope.

Y'all are going to have to enter the giveaway (merely by commenting that you are 'in') and read it for yourselves. Or, of course, you can buy your own copy.

If you want my opinion on the book, you're going to have to wait until after the giveaway is over. I'm quite interested in what other readers have to say about this one.

Just click the photo of the book cover to visit Michelle's website.

Just leave me a comment, and I'll enter you in the giveaway!

I'll announce the winner this weekend!

And The Winner Is...

Kathy from Reflections...by Kathy!

Kathy already knows that she's won the free copy of my friend Katie's book: Rocks, Paper, Flowers!

If anyone else is interested in a copy, just click the book cover and the link will take you to the order page!

Congrats, Kathy! I hope you enjoy the book!

Rocks, Paper, Flowers

Most of you know that my sweet friend, Katie, had her first EVER book published. DoodleBug and I were lucky enough to get ourselves on the invitation list for the book launch party! (AND, stick with me to the end because the publisher is letting me give a copy away to a lucky reader!)

It was so nice and Katie read for us towards the end.

Lots of fellow school staff and faculty were there to cheer her on:

We're quite a talkative bunch. But, when Katie was reading from her book, she had our undivided attention:

The book is great. And not just because she's a friend. It is a good read.

Somewhere around Chapter 10, I realized that I had to slow it way down. Because I didn't want to get to the end of the book. I was caught up and I didn't want it to end.

I'm just going to put my review right here for y'all:

Wow. I would say, "What a great book," and leave it at that but I would be leaving out so many wonderful things about this wonderful book by Katie Sullivan. ROCKS, PAPER, FLOWERS is more than a book. It's a cathartic experience. It's personal. It's relatable. On every level. It's a book about sisters- one of the best relationships a girl can have. And it's about mothers and daughters and love and loss. It's about not only having people in your life to lean on but also about having the courage to actually lean on them. It's about waking up and moving on and taking memories with you as encouragement instead of baggage. It's about personal growth and the fact that it's never too late to learn and do that growing. This book is a must read for anyone who has experienced loss and has difficulty with the grieving process. But, at the same time, it is also for those who have not experienced close loss as serves as a beautiful, gentle reminder to pay attention and appreciate those who are dear to us while they are here with us. A most beautifully written book that will run you through the gamut of emotions from sorrow to joy to sadness to laughter and back again and again. You'll laugh, you'll cry and then you'll call those you love and send them a copy of the book. 

I promise my review is an honest one. And, should y'all decided to give it a read and can't wait to see the results of the giveaway, just go over to Holladay House Publishing and grab one! I've linked you right to Katie's book page (it's available in hardback and paperback).

If you want to wait and try to win a copy, just leave me a comment that you want to enter the giveaway! That's all there is to it!

Well, except that, IF you share this post on Facebook, other social media or your own blog, let me know and I'll gladly give you extra entries for each share!

Katie and DoodleBug

The Truth of Shame

Shame is a funny thing. Funny meaning odd, not hilarious. There's nothing hilarious about shame. Nothing at all. But what I didn't realize until recently is that shame is personal. It stems from different beginnings/acts/circumstances with different people. It carries with it a stamina that is often self-inflicted. It's a real downer. Though we can learn from it. Live through it.

I agreed to read DANCING AT THE SHAME PROM sharing the stories that kept us small which is a collection of personal essays written by women who have carried shame with them for many years.

Admittedly, when I began reading the essays I wondered why in the world these women thought they had anything at all to be ashamed of. Probably because I, for the most part, equate shame with an act committed by the person carrying the shame. But that's not the only way one develops shame.

Sometimes, shame comes to us in childhood when we are developing cognitively and some loser asshole adult does something and then, successfully, transfers the shame to us. Sometimes it's a harsh tone or insensitivity used during a developmental milestone. Sometimes shame comes when we let the narrow-minded opinions others have of us affect us negatively. And, sometimes, shame comes to us when we commit that act that we wish we hadn't.

Regardless of how it comes about, shame is real. And it can be carried for a lifetime.

I'm still not sure why some of the essayists carried shame. But they did. And it was real to them.

What the collection did for me was to open my eyes to shame. Now, instead of blowing off someone because I don't think what happen/who they are is shameful I hope I will tend more towards respecting the fact that their shame is their own and realize that what I'm really doing is judging their shame. That's totally not cool. Besides, it doesn't take understanding the shame to help someone out. It just takes compassion.

WOW (Women On Writing) is planning on giving 5 bloggers an opportunity to win a second copy of the book for a giveaway. Since that isn't happening for a few weeks yet, I thought I'd give y'all a chance to share my copy.

Here's what I'm thinking- I'll randomly choose a name from those of you who are interested and then, after that person reads it, they pass it on to another reader of their choosing.

Just let me know in the comment section if you're interested!

That was Intense

I have another book review for y'all. The book is Sonia's Song by Sonia Korn-Grimani. And, to be honest, I wasn't sure (at first) that I was going to be able to get into this one.

And then I started Chapter 2. And I couldn't put it down.

Until around Chapter 4. When there were times I was afraid to read another word because I didn't know what was going to happen next but I was sure it wasn't going to be good.

I was reading this when the job started which was not a good thing because I took it to school with me and read during every single second I could steal. (Shhh! Don't tell a single soul!).

I'm not going to tell you anything about the ending. But I will tell you that this is a memoir about a Jewish family living in Germany. During the Holocaust.

Oh yeah. This book is intense.

Take this quote, for example:

"Close by, no more than thirty feet, I hear a deafening whistle, and then a huge explosion. A horrible stench of burning rubber fills the air. From under the blanket, I peer up over the edge of the ditch and see trucks on fire. Cadavers are sprawled out over the ground. Silence."

Or this one:

"Tears well up in our eyes, for we know what is coming next. "We cannot stay together as a family anymore. It is too dangerous. We have to split up to stay alive," she says.

See what I mean? I.N.T.E.N.S.E.

But don't let that stop you from reading it! It was a good book- even if I did have to read parts of it with my eyes closed. Y'all know what I mean.

And guess what???? I have something to give away. It's a downloadable gift bag including an e-book copy of Sonia's Song (your choice of e-pub, mobi or pdf) AND an iTunes download of Sonia's music CD "Chansons de Love from Around the World"!

All you have to do is let me know in the comment section that you want to enter. Simple AND worth it!

A special shout-out to the gals over at WOW- Women on Writing for their continued support of amazing authors like Sonia! And for giving me the opportunity to not only read these fabulous books but to offer them to y'all as well!

The Bibliophiles

A little while back I was offered the opportunity to review a book by Karen Berner entitled Until My Soul Gets it Right. Since this was the second book in a series (well, soon to be series) the author (she’s such a wonderful person and fantastic writer) sent me the first book (A Whisper to a Scream) as well. Since I am OCD about doing things in order, I read the first book first.

At first I was disappointed that I had made that decision because I just knew that there was no possible way that the second book would be anywhere near as good as the first one.

I was wrong. And now, I’m so caught up in the characters that I was brassy enough to email Karen and insist that she get that third book written IMMEDIATELY. Thankfully, she is such a nice person, she took my demand request as a compliment. Whew.  

The characters are members of a book club and Karen introduces us to two members in the first book and another member in the second book. No one got one single thing for me from 2 ½ days because I could not get my nose out of the books.

The characters are interesting, far from shallow. There are emotions that run deep and the thoughts that run through their minds are quite familiar. And the humor? The humor was intelligent and, when it showed up, I was laughing out loud- no lie.

Nothing I can tell you would do these books justice. But, I have to say, I will be waiting for the third book and the ones following. And I’ll try not to pester email Karen anymore about getting them written. I mean, three times is probably more than enough. Right?

 

Karen has graciously written a guest post for us today- I think it’s quite appropriate for a lot of us.

Running to Stand Still

By Karen Wojcik Berner

The other day, I was listening to U2’s masterpiece, “The Joshua Tree,” which I hadn’t heard in quite some time. Lately, most of the music in the house has belonged to my sons, but now with one off for his freshman year at college and the other back in junior high, I can once again reclaim the soundtrack of my days.

The song “Running to Stand Still” came on, and I paused to listen, struck by that simple, yet powerful phrase.

Running to stand still.

How many of us are guilty of that? Of going and going and going in hopes of someday being able to finally relax and breathe a bit?

There is always so much to do, an overwhelming list of grocery shopping, working, holidays/parties, exercising, laundry, paying the bills, cleaning, or running incessant errands. I don’t know about you, but I am tired.

This list is compounded by the Internet. In these plugged-in days with email, texting, instant messages, Twitter, Facebook and the rest, the willpower to ignore that little gnat-like, nagging voice urging us to check online just one more time is incredibly important.

An article in the July 16th Newsweek warns that being online too much might actually be creating biological changes in our brains. And not for the better. The article states that “The current incarnation of the Internet—portable, social, accelerated, and all-pervasive—may be making us not just dumber or lonelier but more depressed and anxious, prone to obsessive-compulsive and attention-deficit disorders, even outright psychotic.”

Running to stand still.

I’m trying to incorporate a small part of stillness into my life every day in my quest to achieve a better 

balance. Being a writer/editor, I live on deadlines and the adrenaline rush that accompanies them, so this is not an easy task.

Whether it is taking the time to meditate (or in my case, attempting to meditate), having a cup of tea (THAT I can do!), or lighting a lavender candle and enjoying its scent, make some time to just be. Listen to the wind rustle through the trees. Lie down under a tree and look up at the sky through its ethereal leaves. Watch rain or snowflakes trickle down from the sky.

These actions can free us from feeling like we are hamsters stuck on Habitrail wheels, our minds frantically figuring out what is next on the great “To Do” list of life.

What steps have you taken to incorporate stillness into your life?

Source: Dokoupil, Tony. “Is the Onslaught Making Us Crazy?” Newsweek 16 July 2012: 24-30.

HEY, HEY, HEY! Now guess what? Y’all get to enter for a chance to win a copy of the second book- Until My Soul Gets it Right!  And all you have to do is tell me in the comment section that you want in!

This is not a series to miss.

For more information about the author, Karen Wojcik Berner--
The Bibliophiles: Contemporary fiction with a sprinkling of the classics
Website: www.karenberner.com
Blog: http://karenwojcikberner.blogspot.com

Wine Anyone?

I am not much of a wine drinker. However, when I do partake of the grape, I would love to be able to choose just the right wine for my purposes. I do not know how to do this. But I am learning.

Thanks to WOW-Women on Writing, I found out about author Sara Fasolino who has written a beginners guide to wine for 21 different varieties.

I chose to read the guide to Cabernet Sauvignon mostly because that's the red the husband usually chooses when we need a red. And I make a winter stew that just isn't the same without a cup or so of this wine poured in.

Sara's guidebook covers all you'd ever want/need to know about 21 differenct wines. The Cabernet Sauvignon guide covers the history, the vine, how it's made, where it's made, what affects the taste, how to choose just the right one, how to read labels, the costs, cooking/storing/aging....

The two most interesting things I learned from this little guide were:

• the color of wine comes from soaking the skins; the thicker the skins, the darker the wine.
• the shape of the wine glass affects the taste

Certainly, the rest of the book was enlightening. I enjoyed learning about growing the grapes and how vineyard location affects the taste.

Anyway- you can get one of these guide books for FREE! 
 
Just click HERE and you can choose the free wine e-book of your choice. There are 21 from which to choose!

Hey, maybe if each of us makes a different choice we could all meet somewhere with a bottle of that particular wine and have a mighty fine bloggy wine tasting! 

Do you have a favorite wine?

No Matter How You Slice It---

Divorce Sucks.

I was given the opportunity to read another book through WOW Women on Writing (if you haven't visited that site, give it a look) by Caryn Mirriam-Goldberg entitled Divorce Girl (more info available here).

I was excited about reading this book because of the fact that it takes place in the time that I was a high schoolcollege student (the late '70s) and being a child of divorced parents. Thankfully, my experience was nothing like the main character, Deborah. Or was it?

The point is, divorce is rough on everyone involved. We each have to find our own way through it although some of us merely trudge through it. With no resolution or understanding. And some of us find that even as adults, people close to us use our experience against us. Funny how some of us never escape something like our parents' divorce. 

Luckily for Deborah, she was able to get through it and find her way in the world. And, lucky for us, Caryn has sent us a guest post to share and is giving away a copy of her book to one reader!

What the Life of a Coming-of-Age Girl Has to Do with a Change-of-Life Woman

            I wrote The Divorce Girl based on my own experiences, taking the frame of the teenage wild-family-insanity I lived through, and inserting all new characters to learn more about my past and my present. At the same time, as someone who teaches adult learners at Goddard College and facilitates workshops for adults, what my main character, Deborah, went through in the novel also mirrors what many of us have gone through or are going through: that journey to speak our own truths, chart our own course, lead from our own hearts.

            For most of this, this is a lifelong pursuit: we dialogue with whatever is calling to us in life, finding how to both balance what we know we need to do with what we believe we have to do. It's my hope that this novel offers inspiration, and maybe even some signs and wonders along the way for your own life balancing, and if nothing else, hope and humor through the story of how one girl became a woman, and made something beautiful and strong out of her life.

If you're interested in winning a copy of Caryn's book, The Divorce Girl, just tell me in the comment section! It's definitely an interesting read!

Visit Caryn's website HERE. 

 

The 'U' Post

I just finished an UNBELIEVALBE memoir by Chynna Laird entitled White Elephants. Chynna had a childhood that was UNCONTROLLED, UNRULY, UNCERTAIN, AND UNPREDICTABLE at best.

Oh, there were times of happiness in between the UNHAPPY ones. But, for the most part, she grew up with an UNEASINESS that was very nearly a daily occurrence.   

As her story UNRAVELS, the reader quickly becomes caught up in Chynna's UNSETTLED life and tends to want to help her in her UPHILL battles with her mother.

After such an UNDERTAKING while growing up, it's amazing that Chynna emerged from her childhood seemingly UNSCATHED.

I am featuring a giveaway of White Elephants and a guest post from Chynna herself.

I think you'll find her post fits right in with my theme of health and fitness this month. After all, mental health is part of it, right?

Just let me know in the comment section if you're interested in a chance to win a copy of White Elephants!

Enjoy!

Finding Motivation in Simplicity

What motivates you to go on after everything you’ve been through? This is a question I’ve been asked quite often. When I was younger, it was the refusal to become an addition to the statistic that children of abuse often fall into. In my early adult life, it was the refusal to become my mother. My motivation stemmed from anger, stubbornness and the need to prove that I was…okay. But these aren’t true motivations because they don’t come from a healthy place.

When a child is abused or neglected or suffers another form of trauma, it truly changes a part of her, knocking her off her life’s path just a little bit. It’s enough to make her look at the world and the people in it very differently. And it takes a very long time for her to trust what she sees or to be inspired by the goodness surrounding her.

After the birth of my first child, and soon after that realizing she had high needs, my motivations changed. Suddenly, I no longer felt strength from trying to prove I’d make it, or prove people wrong, but more from the need my child had for me. That’s very powerful.

Today I lead the simplest life I can, mostly because my younger years were filled with so much chaos. So what motivates, or inspires, may seem cheesy or small but it’s real and from that healthy place I couldn’t see so many years ago.

But here are some of the ways I stay try staying motivated:

Drawing from the innocence of children. Children have such a fresh way of seeing the world. They notice everything and they make us want to be better people so they are aspired to be. My children motivate me to keep going even on days I think I’m too exhausted to go on.

Seeing the world through a new perspective. I have two special needs children. The amazing gift they’ve given to me is the realization that there is no one set way of doing things. There is no ‘right’ way, just the best way we can.

Hearing about regular people doing extraordinary things. These stories are everywhere. You don’t have to be rich and famous to do something that matters, you just need to care enough to try making a difference. I work these people into my stories all the time.

Turning to a creative distraction. Despite anything, my mother was a multi-talented woman. And my brothers, sister and I were each blessed with sprinkles of her talent. Whether your creative distraction is music, art, painting, sculpting, dancing or writing, you need one. It’s a positive way to cope with things and to bring you back down on tougher days.

Focusing on the good. There is a lot of pain in my past but there are beautiful things that sprouted out and above those things that I still draw on now. I had loving grandparents, an uncle who supported me and a few close friends who believed in me. These people gave me some good memories and refused to give up on me, even when I wanted to give upon myself. Finding those good things, even if they are few and far between, is essential.

Having a Higher Power. This can mean different things to different people. Whether you call it God, Buddha, Messiah, an angel on earth or you speak to someone who means the world to you that has passed away, you must believe in something higher than yourself. Something that helps keep you grounded and makes you see the world outside of yourself.

Keeping my grandparents close. I just don’t have the words to express how important my grandparents were to me. Whenever I was with them, they gave me a taste of a childhood. They took care of me, they loved me, they nurtured me and none of these things hurt from them. The most important thing they gave to me, aside from unconditional love, was self-worth. They have both been gone for more than twenty years but they are never far away from me. I keep them closest to me on the days I’m having the most difficulty getting through. Feeling them with me keeps me on the path I’m supposed to be on because that’s where they’d want to see me…moving forward.

Accepting that I’m not perfect. What an onus it is to try being perfect. It’s an impossible feat because none of us are born perfect. Honestly, I don’t believe there is such a thing. We are human, naturally flawed. And you know what? That’s okay. We learn from our flaws and imperfections. They make us ‘real’. Trying to be perfect can kill you. Trust me on this one.

Meditation. I meditate everyday. It’s a way to cleanse the mind and unite it with body and spirit. We put ourselves through a lot each day. And much of it is internal. Think about all of the negative thoughts we keep in. Remember all the things we stop ourselves from blurting out. Recall those thoughtless things people can say or do that chip away at our self-esteem and self-worth. Those need to be released somehow because if you allow them to build up, it’s terribly unhealthy. Meditation is a great way to cleanse the soul so you’re ready for whatever life throws your way at any moment.

Exercise. A strong body is better able to hold the rest of you up. Whether it’s yoga, swimming, kick-boxing or whatever gets you going, exercise is essential. Personally, I am much more motivated after a good workout.

These are the things that I make sure are a part of every single day I get to enjoy. Just remember that what motivates you doesn’t have to be big, showy or flashy. The most important forms of motivation are the simplest things. We just need to see them and be strong enough to reach out to them.

This is the twenty-first day of the A-Z April Challenge. I thought I might try a theme this year and focus on my personal journey to health and fitness, including weight loss.

Today's letter is U and my words for the day are...well, you saw them. :)

Excursion

I'm taking a little break from the theme portion of the A-Z Challenge (my health, fitness, weight loss journey) because I committed previously to a book review and guest post.

I did choose an 'E' letter for today based on the book--EXCURSION- because it is about an excursion. Of sorts. A personal, self-discovery type excursion. As well as an excursion of Canada.

The book, WEST OF WAWA by Lisa de Nikolits, was an easy read which I really like when I don't have a lot of time and thought to give a book. As a matter of fact, this would be a great beach read for the summer.

Benny, the main character, works through some life obstacles that left her reeling as she travels through Canada. In a couple of places there are some cliches that were a bit annoying BUT the author uses Benny to address that fact that she's aware of them as cliches thus creating the point that, sometimes, a cliche is just what we need to accurately describe a situation or how we feel.

While there are some descriptive scenes of the Canadian landscape on her excursion, I got all caught up in Benny's personal excursion. Why? Well, maybe she walks around in a cloud of destruction; maybe she doesn't. Maybe she makes some dangerous choices; maybe she doesn't. Maybe she wakes up and smells the coffee; maybe she doesn't. Maybe she has a storybook ending; maybe she doesn't.    

Am I being vague? Maybe. Want to know what happens? Well, you can always buy a copy of the book! OR you can enter to win a FREE copy! Just let me know in the comment section that you want a chance to win and I'll put your name in the pot!

Now, a guest post from Lisa herself!!!
  

Skipping the Tourist Traps and Finding the Heart of a Place

I never know in advance if I’m going to write about a place in a work of fiction or not but one thing’s for sure; I always ditch the guidebook until the very end of my trip.

I like to pretend that I’m an explorer, an adventurer, a fearless female pioneer. I like my observations to be my own, and not swayed by encouragement to walk the roads much travelled; instead, I like to find the hidden gems.

An excellent example of this would be my recent trip to Beijing. I was returning from a family visit to see my family in Sydney, to see how much my beautiful little two-year-old niece had grown and meet my incredibly adorable new nephew (and best I don’t start dwelling on him or this post could end up being about nothing else!)

I always try to see a new part of the world when I head Down Under; I’ve flown back via Hong Kong (fantastic), Singapore (tropical, lush and verdant), Tokyo (cherry blossoms) and this time the return journey was via Beijing.

True to form, I didn’t read up in advance, I booked a hostel close to the Forbidden City and figured I’d take it from there.

A quick note aside, given my predilection for self-discovery, there have also been those awful occasions when I’ve been horribly lost. But I’ve learned from my mistakes and these days I take a map with the hotel circled on it, a business card with the hotel phone number and in this instance, instructions on how to find my hostel written in both English and Chinese. I was therefore safe as houses to head out in the hutong, looking for adventure and what else came my way!

I knew I had to see the Great Wall. That’s pretty much on everyone’s bucket list, right? So I booked my tour and headed off in a tiny minivan, enthusiastically snapping pictures through the window. A couple of hours later we arrived at the Great Wall which was memorable for three things: the Great Wall itself, a horrifyingly terrifying chair lift ride to the top and the awesome gem of a hidden rock cave that I found all by myself.

One could toboggan down from the top of the Great Wall but I chose to walk down instead; I did a lovely meditative walk contemplating the really great greatness of the Wall (how did they do that??), as well as congratulating myself for not having lost my mind due to fear on the ride up, coupled with the joy of never having to ride the chair lift again. Yes, I found it that scary! I’m just not used to dangling several kilometres off the ground in a rickety steel bucket without safety harnesses of any kind…

On the way down, right near the foot of the mountain, vendors were shouting and thrusting their wares and I decided to duck away from the frenzy and see what lay behind a small entrance that was for the most part being ignored. The guide hadn’t mentioned anything to us apart from the ‘small ride up’ (masterfully understating) and encouraging us all to toboggan down. She certainly didn’t mention a rock garden filled with ancient treasures, or a path that led deeper and deeper into the stony wonderland, a wonderland that finally pointed to the entrance of a small cave.

Now, I’m not one for heights and I’m even less enthused about caves. But I had to go in, the cave had invited me, I couldn’t be rude. And when I tentatively eked my way inside, I was, for want of a better word, gobsmacked with awe. Stalactites and stalagmites from outer space, carved by wind, water and millennia. When I got home, I googled ‘ancient rocks of china’ and found some descriptions of the wonders I found: soda straws, chandeliers, frostwork, moonmilk, pillars, boneyards, boxwork, draperies, cave popcorn, cave pearls – rock poetry!

The cave had been lit in with various colored lights and I rather wish it hadn’t – it would have been just as fantastic without the aid of gimmickry.

I stayed in the cave for a while, delighted by my discovery and now, whenever I think of my trip to Beijing, I think of my cave with fondness and joy – and of course I also remember the Wall and that harrowing ride up!

With two days left in Beijing, I consulted the guide book; I still had time for other must-sees, but I’d given myself the opportunity to be an adventurer and an explorer and who knows what character might in appear future books in a cave at foot of the Great Wall of China! 

This is the fifth day of the A-Z April Challenge. I thought I might try a theme this year and focus on my personal journey to health and fitness, including weight loss- but took a break today to honor a previous commitment.

Today's letter is E and my word for the day is EXCURSION.

BTW- the winners of copies of CARING LESSONS are:

 Mama Zen at  The Zen of Motherhood

skoots mom at my hands His Glory 

I've emailed both winners and have heard back from both! Enjoy the book ladies and congrats!

Thursday's Faves

Thursday means it's time for Thursday's Favorite Things over at Katherine's Corner!

And guess who's co-hosting?!

ME!

How much fun is this?! Meeting new friends, visiting with old friends--it's a friend kind of hop! 

One of my favorite things to do is READ. Sometimes, I won't get one darn thing done during a day other than read a book. It's like a sickness. A delightfully wonderful sickness. 


Sometimes, I might have two or three books going (in different rooms) at the same time. 


I love to read.


I just finished reading a memoir by Lois Roelofs called CARING LESSONS. 

Some of you might have figured out that I enjoy reading memoirs. I like to hear about other people's lives and learning about their time periods, laughing at their funny stories, gasping with disbelief at things they have experienced, etc. 

One of the most interesting things about this book is hearing about the field of nursing. All the study, hours, time, bloodsweatandtears that go into obtaining a nursing degree. But, even more than that, what makes a nurse.

Lois discusses how she learned that nursing is more than performing procedures. It's so much more. 

"...it's not necessarily just what we say to people, but how we act: how we listen, how we encourage, how we empathize, and how we show respect..." (from Caring Lessons page 115).  


Her thirst for knowledge was fueled by Lois' desire to serve others. The more she knew, the better able she was to help. 


This book could have been about my BFF- her life parallels Lois' in a way. They both have remained true to their upbringing to this very day; they are always improving themselves in an effort to better help others; always putting everyone ahead of themselves...


I found Caring Lessons to be a good read! 


If you'd like to read Caring Lessons or have a nurse in your family or circle of friends, I've got good news! Lois is giving away a copy to one lucky reader. 

WAIT! There's more! I'm going to pass along my copy too!  


All you have to do is leave me a comment that you'd like to have a copy and I'll let that random thingy pick the winning numbers! SIMPLE!


Thursdays Favorite Things Hop is where you can link your favorite post to share with old and new followers, or write a post about your favorite things!

Here are the rules, yes there are rules. But just a few:

• You must follow Katherines Corner. Through Email, Linky Followers, Google Plus, or RSS and my blog Empty Nest If you’re a new follower, please let us know before you start hopping. 
• Leave a comment when you follow so we all know you stopped by.
• No adult content blogs.
• Blogs only please.
• Follow as many other blogs in the list as you can. Just click and go.
• Leave a sincere comment or message on each of the blogs you visit so they know you stopped by.

Now hop on and share your favorites. If you’d like to post this blog hop on your page please just grab the linky code. Or if you would like to be a co-host please contact Katherine

 *participants who link up will be sent weekly reminders of this wonderful hop*

Please grab the hop button to share with others, you can copy and paste the image with a link to KatherinesCorner.com OR grab the code from Katherines Corner it's on her right sidebar.

It’s always nice to have the hop button on your post. But it IS NOT mandatory.

Are You a Clutterer?

What the heck IS a clutterer? That wasn't my first question when I was given an opportunity to review Pesi Dinnerstein's book, A CLUTTERED LIFE, but it quickly became the second one. 

I thought the book was going to be about a woman who suddenly realized her mind was cluttered (like me). Or her circumstances (like mine). Or something but I did not realize it was about being a clutterer until I got into the book. 

Not that being a clutterer doesn't infiltrate one's entire life. It does. And Pesi does a fabulous job of giving her readers an insider look at the life of a clutterer. 

Did this book lead to me to realize that I am a clutterer? No. But I did recognize Hubs on those pages. And pretty much everyone in his immediate family as well. AND a couple of people in my family. 

Holy Crap! 

So I did a very little bit of research (read I googled clutterer) and found a couple of websites devoting to identifying and helping clutterers. 

Clutterless even offered a list of questions to ask yourself in an effort to determine whether or not you are a clutterer. Which I answered for myself and discovered that I am not a clutterer. (So I guess that just leaves unorganized and lazy for me.).

Being the sweet person I am, I also answered it for Hubs. Who does, come to find out, resemble a clutterer. 

And it drives me NUTS. Absolutely NUTS. 

I think one thing I'm supposed to get from Pesi's book though is that no matter how crazy it makes me (did I mention it DRIVES ME NUTS?) it's much worse for the clutterer.

Most clutterers are NOT hoarders. Clutterers don't obsess about their stuff and feel compelled to get more and more. Their stuff just piles up. While they might have some emotional attachments to some items, they do not collect trash and so on.

So we are now embarking on the declutterization of Hubs' stuff. It's not that he doesn't want to. It's just overwhelming and that makes it hard to find a starting place.

Once we get everything down to manageable piles, I can help him organize. And keep him organized. 

It's going to have to be a team effort. But, that's what we are. A team.

Only one problem. What am I going to do when all his clutter is cleaned up and makes my stuff stick out?

AND NOW, a word from Pesi herself!!!

IN NEED OF EDITING:

My Manuscript and My Life

by Pesi Dinnerstein

            “Peretz, I’m drowning!” I said to my old friend as soon as he picked up the phone.

            “What are you drowning in today?” he asked—familiar, as he was, with my tendency to become overwhelmed by the details of life.

            “Well, my manuscript needs revision, and I’ve been ignoring everything else  while I’m working on it, so now my entire life feels out of control.  I have such a mess around me that I can’t concentrate on my writing; but I have no patience to deal with the mess because I really want to work on the manuscript.  And, meanwhile, the piles are growing higher every day.”

            “It sounds like you need a good editor,” he said.

            “You mean, for the book?” I asked.

            “No, I mean for your whole life.”

            I had never thought of it in quite that way, but he definitely had a point.

            “It’s really one and the same,” he went on to explain.  “Too many things, too many words, too much input—it all creates clutter.  But instead of trying to decide whether you should be organizing, filing, recycling, getting rid of, or revising—why not think of it all as editing?  Edit your clothing; edit the back seat of your car; edit that stack of unread mail; and edit your manuscript.  Then, it will feel like one big project instead of all these little fragmented activities competing for your attention.  It’ll be much more efficient that way—and a lot more fun.”

            I wasn’t totally convinced.  I mean, using a wrap-around metaphor like that was very creative, and it definitely raised the mundane tasks of daily living to a higher level—but, in the end, they were still what they were.  A pile of dirty laundry—no matter what I chose to call it—remained a pile of dirty laundry. 

            On the other hand, I had no plan of my own, so I decided to give Peretz’s approach a try.  I woke up early the next morning, determined to begin editing my life.  Instead of cleaning out closets, sorting through bulging drawers, and filling bags for Goodwill, I told myself that I was now about to create new chapters, combine sections, eliminate redundancy, delete, cut and paste.  Of course, at first, it all felt like a rather silly game of semantics; but, then, something unexpected began to happen.

            My life and my writing started to mirror each other.  As I uncluttered the space in one area, new space seemed to open in the other; and, little by little, a sense of order came to prevail on both sides.

            Of course, it wasn’t all that noticeable at first; but, as the process unfolded, there was a definite shift.  My desire to keep things simple flowed back and forth between my writing and my daily life with increasing ease.  Using fewer words somehow translated into wanting fewer things; and thinning out my closet seemed to create a desire for leaner prose.  Soon, both my manuscript and the mess in my house were growing considerably lighter.

            For me as a writer, the awareness that language has the power to change my life was hardly a revelation.  But as a cluttered person, discovering that words could transform my chaos into order felt like nothing less than a little miracle.  

GUESS WHAT I HAVE? A copy of Pesi's book, A CLUTTERED LIFE to giveaway! 

 

Y'all know how it goes here- just comment that you want in and I will enter you in the drawing. I'll announce the winner by the weekend!

Does Life Ever Get You Down?

Some of us may think that we have known the hardships, disappointments, sadness, etc. of life like no one else in the world ever has. And we may have. But, comparatively speaking, I am not so sure.

I mean, my brother has never thrown me out of the family. I've not been married multiple times having each attempt end badly. I've never been abused by anyone- physically, mentally, intellectually, verbally, etc. I've never wondered where my next meal will come from or had to 'farm out' my children until I could support them financially or provide for their safety.

I've just completed When Ties Break A Memoir About How to Thrive After Loss and I can honestly say that I have never come across someone in this life who has been through as many...life obstacles, deterrents to happiness...whatever you want to call them. as Margaret Norton has.

So, what sets her apart from any other stories out there? Margaret conquers fears. She clear those insurmountable obstacles. She keeps trying even after experiencing defeat, time after time after time. After time.

I'm pretty sure I would have given up long, long ago. Not to mention held some grudges. But not Margaret.

Want to know how she was able to forgive? How she picked herself back up and started over again every single time? Want to know how she kept plugging along even though every hand she was dealt seemed to be a bad one? Want to know what she has learned through all her trials?

Then you're in luck! Because she's giving away a copy of her book to one of YOU! All you have to do is tell me in the comment section that you'd love to win a copy and you will be entered!

Meanwhile, please enjoy this guest post from Margaret on change.

Change.  Good, Bad or Indifferent?

“You must like change” is a comment I often hear. My family and friends believe that I do change well because I do it frequently.  It’s a skill that I’ve been perfecting my whole life. My father moved seven times before I graduated from high school, forcing me to deal with change as a young child.

When my first husband walked out on me, leaving me with two young children, I was forced to make many difficult changes. Life as I knew it ended and I was angry for a very long time. Why should I have to change because he no longer wanted what I had to offer?

For the past 17 years I’ve worked in the mortgage industry, laid off numerous times. The first time it happened, I was forced to make unwanted lifestyle changes. But each layoff got easier and I came to view those times as new adventures.

What have I learned from all the changes I’ve experienced? If we instigate change does that make it easier? Is change good, bad or indifferent? As I approach my sixtieth birthday, these are my beliefs about change. Most of these I write about in my memoir, When Ties Break. 

• Change is a vital part of life. Nothing ever stays the same. Dale Carnegie said “When you’re green you’re growing, when you’re ripe you’re rotten.”  I discovered a long time ago that I preferred ripe to rotten and I was the one who could control that. 
• Change is hard. We get comfortable with our lifestyles. We form patterns, routines, and know what to expect. Even when we’re unhappy, we often choose to stay that way because we fear the unknown. We often go to great links to avoid change. 
• Attitude is everything. When making a change it is much easier if we focus on the positive. If we fight the inevitable this makes it harder. On the other hand, if we embrace change with a positive attitude it seems to be easier. Some people believe that nothing is good or bad but rather it’s our attitude that creates the circumstances. 
• Prospective is important. When faced with difficult changes it helps to remember that this too shall pass. Nothing lasts forever. The Bible says there is a time and season for everything. It helps when dealing with unwanted change to remember that this leads to something else. The something else can actually be better than what you have now. 
• Most of the things that we fear never happen. Change involves the unknown which is the breeding ground for all kinds of fears. “What if” we ask ourselves over and over? Fear of failure prevents many individuals from pursuing change, when in reality most of the things we dread never come to be. 
• Don’t let anyone else define your goals and dreams or your success and failure. We worry too much about what others think about us. This doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t value their opinions but we need to learn to trust our intuition. So many times we allow others to talk us out of something because of their fears or insecurities. 
• What’s your motivation to change? Sometimes we change for all the wrong reasons – to get back at someone, to prove something, etc. This is never a good idea and we end up suffering. Sometimes we put off making a change because of how it might affect someone else. Rather than making spur of the moment – fly by the seat of your pants decisions – its best if you analyze the change before implementing it. Determine what your real motivation is. 
• Change can be good. It forces us to grow and expand. Different experiences make us more interesting, while increasing our knowledge and making us more rounded individuals.   Sometimes we have to experience the bad before we get to the good. 
• Develop your sense of humor. Change is stressful and we need outlets to relieve the stress. Don’t take yourself seriously and learn to laugh at yourself. My second husband was better than my first, my third husband was better than my second, and my fourth husband needs to be rich. 
• It’s okay to ask for help. Some change, like a difficult divorce, is too much to handle alone. Sometimes it’s necessary to consult a professional counselor, rely on the help of a good friend or engage the services of a Personal Life Coach. I just happen to know someone who I can recommend.

 

Interested in more Margaret?

Independent Rep for    http://www.margaretnorton.itworks.net  

Follow my  Quest for Better Health   

Personal Life Coach, Writer, Speaker

www.margaretnortonlifecoach.com

Find me on    http://twitter.com/#!/margaretnorton   and   Facebook

When Ties Break   Kindle:    http://www.amazon.com/dp/B005PTVZCS

Want to win a copy of When Ties Break?

Just leave a comment that you'd like to be entered!